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  • Natalie Bristowe

Body Confidence - Being Skinny does NOT equal being Happy

Updated: Mar 15, 2022

Body confidence is something that I struggled with for a number of years.

Over the past 15 years, I have fluctuated in weight, I’ve over exercised, under-eaten, and even when I was my ‘skinniest’, I still didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. Does this resonate with you??

Being skinny does not = Being happy.

I have come to realise that I was striving for something so surface level - I was aiming to be a certain size, fit into a pair of jeans that I bought a size too small so that I felt incentivised to lose weight… I got so wrapped up in how I looked, comparing myself to others, fixated on what I was eating, overwhelmed by a feeling of guilt for treating myself to a piece of cake every once in a while.

And in all this, I lost sight of what I actually really wanted – to feel good, to feel energised, confident in myself and around others. I wanted to feel happy, joyful and enjoy experiences with friends and family creating lifelong memories. Instead, I felt miserable, alone with a lack of self-worth and self-love, and a constant focus on my flaws, pointing out everything I hated and speaking to myself in a way that I would speak to no-one else. I would look in the mirror and call myself ‘fat’, ‘disgusting’, literally saying out loud 'no-one will be attracted to you'.

I would complain about being ‘too fat’ tirelessly to my poor sister, mum, friends and boyfriend. The whole thing was exhausting - for me and everyone around me. The truth is that no-one cares what you look like. Who ever said, “I love Nat because she has a perfect thigh gap”? No one.

What we think, we become

The purpose of this blog is to share some of the valuable tools, techniques and lessons that I have learned, and continue to learn, on my journey of self-discovery and self-love.

I will start by sharing the biggest takeaway. What we think, we become. Therefore, by changing the way you think, you can change the way you perceive yourself.

How can you change your thought patterns?

1. Awareness - Become aware of your negative thoughts - what is that inner critic repeatedly saying?

2. Interrupt your negative thoughts - as soon as they enter your mind, and replace them with a more positive and empowering thought such as ‘I move and nourish my body so that I can be the best version of myself’, or ‘I am enough’, ‘I am beautiful’, ‘I am worthy’

3. Gratitude - take time to have gratitude and appreciate all that your incredible body does for you. Become aware and grateful for all the things that do bring this feeling of happiness and joy - your friends, family, waking up in a warm bed…whatever it is. The more you show gratitude, the more you will notice you have to be grateful for.

4. Affirmations - Write down positive and empowering affirmations that are in alignment with the version of yourself you are becoming. Write these daily, stick them on your mirror and all over your home. This will plant seeds in your mind, and overtime as you read them - your focus and thoughts will shift to this.

5. Nourish your body - Eat and drink the things that make you feel good, nourished and energised.

6. Move your body - Exercise and movement releases endorphins which make you feel good in yourself. Exercise is as important for physical health as it is mental health.

7. Relationships - Surround yourself with people who leave you feeling lit up and energised. The people who fill you with joy.

8. Stop comparing yourself to others. Stay in your lane. You are beautifully and perfectly unique and exactly as you should be.

9. Self-love – Give love to your body, listen to it. Rest it, move it, love it. No one is going to care for it and give it the love that it truly needs and deserves.

10. Social Media – In a world where social media is at the forefront, it might be unrealistic to suggest deleting platforms such as Instagram, tik tok, but instead of following accounts that make you feel pretty sh*t about yourself, leverage these platforms – follow people who inspire you. Surround your platforms with accounts that educate, inspire and motivate you to become the best version of yourself.

These are some of the tools and techniques which combined make a huge impact.

Be kind to yourself on this journey.

Remember, this is a lifestyle change. Be patient, kind and compassionate with yourself. Think of it as a mind-gym. You don’t go to a normal

gym and walk out with instant abs after one session. It takes time, commitment and practice and overtime you will begin to see the shifts. And in experiencing these shifts, you unlock the door that leads to a life filled with happiness, love and confidence. A life that you truly love and totally deserve.

If you would like to hear more about working with me and how I can help you transform your mindset into one of self-love, empowerment and confidence, book your free discovery call today! I would love to help.

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